Tragic Story of a ”War refugee separated from her 3 Children”

The ethnic battle continues to rage back and forth; the insurgency may have been defeated, but conflict remains in the form of words and increasingly polarised ideologies. Yet, in the midst of these vociferous exchanges, who can hear the IDPs themselves; the ones who have been firmly planted into a situation that is the direct result of a conflict they have no say in?

Although their state of being is generally known to the public, their individual stories go untold and therefore unheard. Their tragedy is so far-reaching and widespread that it is spelled in the form of figures and statistics instead of real and poignant accounts of individual and personal suffering.
Kala, a mother of three from Kilinochchi, provides a personal account of her experience. Her family fled their home following the army takeover of Kilinochchi in January, and since their departure she recounts that they have lived in 19 different places. She is now with her husband in a location where he is undergoing hospital treatment.

However, during the course of their displacement she was separated from her children, who she now believes to be residing in an IDP camp. Her story is heartbreaking, but it is one of many. She is merely one out of thousands who have lost families and homes as a result of the civil conflict, making the waves of suffering concentrated in the north all the more overwhelming when examined in such individual terms.

Speak openly

Furthermore, Kala is one of the few IDPs who has the opportunity to speak openly of her experiences. Although she has not been in an IDP camp herself, she has undergone numerous suffering and traumas at the hands of war, and her story serves as a reminder of the widespread tragedy that afflicts the civilians of this country, who continue to pay in pain, lives and tragedy for a war they had no desire to be a part of.

Kala is only 30 years old, but she appears frail, with three children all below the age of seven. “We used to be a happy family of my husband, three sons, my mother-in-law and brother-in-law” says Kala. “Unexpectedly, because of the problems in the country, we lost everything; our house, belongings and wealth. We have had to live in 19 different places, including a bunker, and we have endured untold poverty and sadness.”

Separated from children

In April, Kala and her husband were injured and then transported to Padaviya Hospital for treatment. They were both rendered unconscious by the attack, and on waking up in hospital did not know the whereabouts of their children. “We both had heavy hearts and were sobbing together as we could not find our boys” says Kala.

Kala and her husband have been moved between various hospital around the island. They are currently together, but are still estranged from their children. They have no money, family, or a place to stay. Kala is desperate to find her children but cannot travel back to the North without her husband, who is yet undergoing hospital treatment. She has been away from her children for two months now, and is unsure of their safety and wellbeing.

Helplessness and fear are etched on her face and she is torn between the need to look after her husband and returning to the North to search for her children. The decisions she faces are tough, and her problems are only further intensified by the fact that she lacks finances and even the most basic of possessions, such as clothes and soap. She is visibly distressed at the thought of her children alone in a camp.

Although she has not been inside one herself, she knows of their conditions and says that water and toilet facilities are poor and there is little shelter from the sun, making habitation a difficult experience.

Wants to live in peace

When asked about her opinion regarding the ethnic conflict, Kala states quite simply that all she wants is to be able to live in peace, to be reunited with her family and have a stable home, and to not live in fear any longer. Kala wants her story told because “no one should have to suffer the way we have suffered”.

Fear makes her somewhat reticent, but it is evident that her sole concern is for the wellbeing of her family. She has no political inclinations, as these seem trivial compared to her humanitarian plight. It is reasonable to believe that her view represents that of the majority of IDPs, who do not want any form of conflict or political victory, but simply the basic human rights and dignities that have been denied to them.

All around Colombo the radical protests of the Tamil diaspora are heard and jubilant posters of military victory are seen, yet ironically, it is the urgently tragic stories like these – the ones which require immediate and compassionate responses — that are the most silenced and suppressed.